Day 168: The Power of No

They say that Google tried to sell the company many many times or many attempts and they didn't sell it so they stuck with it and now it's a giant. 

Today I want to talk about the No's, the no's are what makes one find their way. It avoids the way that they should not go. I think that when we get no's is because there is another way, better way for us. 

And also there is something to learn when we get a no. For example in sales, every time we get a no we have something to improve, something we missed. I think that.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be 'allergic to No's'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear no's, to fear rejection

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that every rejection I get, I learn and I get stronger

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that if I got a yes every time I want to do something, I would be doing anything instead of what's the best

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can learn from every no

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe, that in learning you have to avoid mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to avoid making mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that making mistakes is how I can learn the fastest

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe if I don't make mistakes I am doing better, when in fact it's not so

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear making mistakes,  because apparently they are bad

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge mistakes as bad

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe it's better not making mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not embrace making mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am less if I make mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe my self-value depends on how many mistakes I make

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that in the real world when you make a lot of mistakes you are closer to the goal

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe perfection is not making mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not give myself space to make mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being judged if I make mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I have to do something right the first time

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that to improve I need to make mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not knowing what to say

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I have to do everything alone 

I forgive myself that they have accepted and allowed myself to believe it's being weak when one asks for help from someone else

I forgive myself that I have accepted around myself to believe seeking help is being weak

I forgive myself that I have accepted around myself to not see that the more competitive people have teams

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being in a team

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that participating in a team can be good

Day 167: Fear of Being Homeless

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being homeless

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having any support

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear suffering

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to both fear remaining a wage slave and homeless

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief I can only be an employee

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can improve myself to do different things to get money from

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having enough to eat

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that a normal so-called job gets most of my time

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that with a normal life I will have a very poor retirement

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I will suffer if I am merely an employee

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I should create my own business

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that without money I will suffer

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that this world is cut-throat about money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am my own limitations

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can change my mindset, to change my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to simply accept my limitations

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I have been programmed to lose

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I have to reprogram myself to win

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I cannot get good habits

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I will be fat the rest of my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that I can become fit

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that it is not about being worried about money, but about doing something

Day 166: Facing Life in Self-Forgiveness

 Here is a bit of my life in self-forgiveness, my fears, my insecurities and how to build a new life for me free from pointless jobs. How I do it? I don't know. I just know that I can do it one breath at a time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to have everything smooth sailing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being poor

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I don't have to be far away from home to get money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I don't have to suffer necessarily to make money 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe i can only do one type of job

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not give myself the opportunity to learn something new or a degree to change careers

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see realize and understand that I am free to do what I want - not without responsibility but I have freedom

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see realize and understand that if where I am I am not satisfied, I can change it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I cannot get a job somewhere else

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am the beginning and the end

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am not forced to do anything in this world at all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be self-honest with myself that I hate my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take drugs to avoid living, in the life that I hate

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe others will think I am taking drugs which I am not since one year

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that drugs gave me companionship and that's one reason why I used them

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that now I have the real power to build the life that I really want

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want a relationship

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see realize and understand that I have to be patient

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see realize and understand that I have opportunities and I can use them

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that there's not always and there will not be forever opportunities for myself, maybe

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that death doesn't care about my timetables, my schedules, it just arrives

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that time doesn't stop for me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I have specialness in me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I will become someone relevant

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that if I don't do relevant things, I will become irrelevant

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not trust myself and take drugs in the past to avoid reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to manifest consequences for my drug taking

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see realize and understand that my fuck-ups are for me to solve

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that even if it takes time I can overcome consequence

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that if I want another life I have to build it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want the attention of others

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear this blog will be too short or too long

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to care about others instead of care about myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that if everyone cares for themselves first, then everyone is cared for

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that the job where I am at is not the end of the train track for my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that I remain

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that no matter what happens, no matter how bad it gets, I will stand up for myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear consequence

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to put as an excuse that I fear something, to not face it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I don't fear anything - at all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I can program my life to be the best that it can be

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear and to believe that I cannot do more in this life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear I will not have enough money if I have consequence playing out in my reality

Day 165: Discipline and Balance

Discipline is not banging my head to the wall, although it could be if I had set that as a goal lol, I see that discipline is doing what I said - to me or others - until I'm done. 

I see I didn't fully understand Discipline and it seemed to me it came from the outside, when it has to come 'from within/from me' for Me, as something that I use to complete my goals, commitments and agreements.

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I cannot be disciplined

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe discipline is hard

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that discipline is habit

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that whatever I allow to do in one day, I allow to do in many

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear boredom if I am disciplined

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that on the other side of discipline is what I really want in my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I cannot be disciplined with food

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I cannot go back to be thin

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the future

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not discipline myself into being Here at all times aware

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am not worthy of being realized

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I don't deserve to have a good life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am sinful

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am a sinner

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I have to be gentle and easy on myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I don't have to have wants in this life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can choose whatever I want to experience in this life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can decide what I want to do in this life and do it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that once I am dead it's too late

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand I am so hard on myself that I don't even want to want anything

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not want to experience anything in this world

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not explore what it is that I want to experience in this world

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see that discipline is to do what I say I was going to do and nothing else 

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that whatever I commit to do is what I have to do with discipline

Day 164: Lazy Gets Nothing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge what I say. Okay, no judgement, only me and you, here, in this moment, no fluff, all grain.

I have a friend that when he's with me all the time he thinks what can I say that is interesting. He comes up with stuff that to me is boring. So I will not try to come up with anything interesting to you because maybe you will find it boring. So, did you know that who doesn't want to change their life because he thinks he's too fucked up.

is because he's lazy and don't want to rearrange everything inside themself? Because like today I was at work and we work with packages of furniture in... on... on pallets and I was saying to my colleague this pallet is fucked up I need to do something with it,

or change a new one. He said that you are lazy you don't want to change it, from take it apart. 

So it's like in life one has to take it apart, pause, stop for a moment, stop with capital letters and then slowly slowly

deconstruct ourselves, slowly slowly, stop ourselves when there's nothing, you reach the point of nothingness and from here we go up up not in the sense of higher but in the sense of building ourselves the way we want to be and this is what I'm doing with these blogs.

thank you very much

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be lazy

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not want to face my life head on and apply myself in changing myself with the tools available

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am capable of changing myself and so must do it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to put excuses to not apply myself and change myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear, Missing out on everything on life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be interesting to others

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be, Interesting for others instead of being interesting for myself

I commit myself to remind myself that I must make myself interesting for myself only

I commit myself to remind myself that I am with myself always so I Should become interesting for myself not for others

Day 163: Con-ditioned

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to diminish myself in my daily living. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I don't have to diminish myself at all. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am freedom.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I don't have to condition myself to anyone else 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be gentle

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not go easy on myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe it will not work if I am not feeling it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I don't need to have any feeling for me to apply self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe the thoughts I have about self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand the gift that is self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not forgive myself for real

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe resistance to applying self-forgiveness is real

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that it doesn't matter if it feels difficult, I have to apply self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I must forgive myself to let go of the past and limitations

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself, in the past, to want to be close to people with money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can be the one that makes money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that self-limitations can be in many aspects of self

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am here in every moment of breath, aware, present

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that my father is always with me, no matter what

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that all my loved ones, my grandfather, all are with me at all times

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not honor the support that I have been receiving

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to act as if I don't have support from the hereafter

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I have to explain myself instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that first of all I have to understand myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to act as if I am alone when I am alone

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand the phrase 'everything is known at all times'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear sounding mind washed

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that you are brainwashed if you don't apply self-forgiveness and change

Day 162: Percieved Limitations

 

So what are or do you have limitations? Then if you don't have limitations let's do what's best for all. If you cannot do that it means you have limitations.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the belief that I have limitations

I forgive myself for not seeing that the world is only limited by physical laws and nothing else

I forgive myself for not seeing, realizing, and understanding that those who claim what's best for all is impossible are simply winning for themselves and not wanting everyone to win

I forgive myself for not seeing, realizing, and understanding that we have no excuse not to do what's best for all

I forgive myself for not seeing, realizing, and understanding that only those who are comfortable will not want everyone to be comfortable

I forgive myself for not seeing, realizing, and understanding that what's best for all is not selfish

I forgive myself for not seeing, realizing, and understanding that we can organize ourselves to create a world that's best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand the limitations of those that say that what's best for all is not possible

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand the extent of the brainwashing that there is nowadays, where no one regards what's best for all and everyone lives in self-interest only

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand the extent to which I have been brainwashed to not consider what's best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that in common sense we are all equal and we all deserve the same things to take care of ourselves.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see the simplicity in common sense of we have to be there for each other

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the resources on earth should be allocated to the inhabitants of the planet, everyone included

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to become rich and in my quest disregard everything else and Equality for All

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that unless I stand up for myself, nothing magical will happen

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that there is no magical way into a world that's best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I will die, and when I die, I will regret not having stood up for myself and for All as Equals as Life