Day 182: Start Again

Failed? Start again - or go 'back to basics' is also the expression.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to hate myself for not doing what I think I should do

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I am doing a lot by working full time and I should not be hard on myself

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I don't have to be pushed around even by me /  not by me

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to be angry at myself for past mistakes

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I have to accept the past and let it go

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand failing is part of getting up

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I will only be miserable if I think I am miserable

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I don't have to live up to my expectations in a single day - but instead have patience

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I am fine even with unmet expectations

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand it is not about meeting expectations but removing expectations

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to be dissatisfied because of unmet expectations

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to have high expectations of myself

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I don't even have investigated where this expectations come from before accepting them

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I am changing one day at a time

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I am  enough

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand life is not about expecting but walking 

Day 181: Past Giving Up

 Today at work I wanted to give up, in a moment it seemed that something break, I was ready to stop working.

If I gave up, I know the result, I lose my job and go back home, but, if I continue?

 If I choose this other path of keep going, this route I don't know where it will lead me, and to me its more interesting

So I continued the work and it came up better that I expected and the production numbers were fine

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to want to give up at the workplace

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see there is a point past giving up

I commit myself to remind mysel I should always take the route that is best and let go of the past and never utilize excuses to perform inadequately

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not trust myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand there is nothing wrong in manual work

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to consider giving up

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand common sense which dictates that one must do what's best for all and that is it

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to want to stop doing work before I am done

I commit myself to remind myself I don't finish when I want, I finish when I'm done

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I can build a good career at my job

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that comfort is not expression

I commit myself to remind myself the answer lies past giving up - I keep going

I commit myself to remind myself that it is always only about choosing the old or the new

I commit myself to rend myself I will never be satisfied with my life doing what I've always done - so I can choose, new beggining not repeating the past - or suffering

I commit myself to remind myself that even when I give up I immediately continue and thus open the next door 'past giving up' and keep going

Day 180: Complex Subjects

Facing/studying complex subjects I should fear not, for I can take it in bite sized portions and use tools to help me in learning it. Recently I've been studying a vast subject and have been a bit discouraged by slow progress, I see I don't have to judge my progress and instead build on the building blocks of the subject until I have achieved mastery of it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to learn L in a day

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that anything of worth needs careful study

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I must be comfortable with discomfort

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that complexity becomes easy with sustained attention

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not 'having what it takes' to learn complex subjects

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not trust myself learning L

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I am capable of learning anything

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I already have patience enough to Learn anything

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I have the tools to learn anything

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that it is simple to learn something

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to want to learn L without dedication

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to believe things must be available instantly like fast food

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see the value in learning things that take time to master

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I am more patient than I think

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear not being able to work my job if I study into the night

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I am ready to learn anything

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that wether I believe I am ready or not I am both correct

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that if I do everything totally there is no fail possible

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to hold back when 'doing things'

I commit myself to remind myself I can learn anything

I commit myself to remind myself everything is possible

I commit myself to remind myself 'impossible' is I'm Possible

Day 179: See Something? Say Something

 This world is not all that it can be. There is a lot of suffering and no one is exempt from homelessness. Once you are homeless it is too late. Most pepole don't have a safety net and can easely become homeless in a 'bad turn of events'. In every big city there is homelessness and it is not okay.

We 'are trained' to turn a blind eye. I visited Bucharest and there were homeless people, I'd gladly help them all but it is a systemic problem and I don't have the funds to do it myself. The system says 'ignore the homeless' and when it is your turn to be homeless, guess what? You are ignored.

It is vital for everyone on Earth to change the system to one that uplifts everyone, and the ultra rich will need to 'tone it down' -- we can raise the level of wealth for all to live a 'millionlaire' level of comfort and freedom, just not 'ultra rich' 'billionaire' status, thats not sustainable.

EMS Equal Money System, I'm one vote for it. 

'The Equal Money System is a New Worldwide system as a solution to provide All human beings with resources to Live an Equal and Dignified life. This System will be a first step in the political and democratic agenda of the Equal Life Party Worldwide'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that there is no solution for homelessness eventhough I can see there are enough resoruces on Earth for everyone

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that homelessness is a result of the current money sytem and it can be change into an EMS

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to turn a blind eye when I see a homeless person

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see how money create castes as in levels for people to live out, with homelessness at the bottom and billionaire status at the top -- not Equal

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I am a valuable member of society in the degree that I work on myself to change it to what's Best for All

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that the sytem trule does not care about me, only in the measure that I can get money and when I can't, the system chews me up and spits me out as homeless

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to follow blindly the sytem precepts of get a job make money and forget about everything else

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see the cost of me living 'my life' and 'that's it' as that creates the continuation of the system as it is

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I have to change others to change the sytem instead of seeing, realising and understanding I have to change myself and thus be an example - that's it

178: God & Me

If you cannot find something it means that you are that something and when you hear this phrase you think maybe about God, no one can find him therefore we are all God and this carries a big responsibility because we literally shape the way the Earth is and its problems

There are no problems, there are only solutions

The solution is an equal money system where everyone is supported

And on an individual level I can change my life at any given point when I am tired of the way I have been so called manifesting or creating a life that I don’t like for myself, I can change it

So 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe my life has to be or go the way it has been going

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to direct myself to continue the way of life I have without questioning

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not have zest for life, to not be anticipating good things

I forgive myself that I have accepted and around myself do not see realize and understand that I can have, be and become whatever I want in this life 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and around myself do not see and realize and understand the gift that I have been given of money in the form of a paycheck in the form of a work so that i can develop myself in any way I want 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and around myself do not see realize and understand that I don’t have to be a wage slave all my life 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and around myself do not see realize and understand that I am not who I was - who I have always been, and I am not anyone new also - I am the one that has been here all the way along and will be after I die

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that death will easy my life instead of seeing that my life is actually very easy

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that creating my life means being uncomfortable at points

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that being god means having a lot of responsibility 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be afraid of responsibility or avoid it, try to avoid it 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe I can lose myself in something I can do - when this is impossible 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to use drugs in the past to not face myself

 I forgive myself that i have accepted on myself to be pessimistic about myself and my life 

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that I have the marvel of marvels on Earth which is a human physical body

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to disregard my physical body, and not properly take care of it 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that change is inevitable - change is what it is what is going on - but I can direct change to be the best possible for Me and for All

Day 177: Air Traffic

Today I was thinking, if there is air traffic control in every country, why can’t we make a system that provides for everyone? We can do it.

There is no excuse

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the world is artificially scarce

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that this world favors the super rich and the rich and the elite instead of favoring everyone equally

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear challenging the status quo

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to have a good experience instead of doing what is best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand the hypocrisy of the rich saying that this is how is it how it is not able to change to be changed 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see realize and understand that i have to speak up for everyone every one life, every single human being

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see realize and understand that if i don’t speak up I am accepting and allowing the abuse to continue

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see realize and understand that unless i take action nothing will change

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the change starts with my self-change and nowhere else

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that for the world to change I have to change myself first

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I have the tools to change and that I can get more to change more

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that staying in silence is abusive in this world of abuse

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that scarcity is artificial

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that everywhere that help is needed, help is able to go, like when countries need extra food, water, or other medical attention, medical supplies, etc

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I have to make an inner work for me to be able to stand up for myself and for all

Thank you

Day 176: I’m Possible

I don't feel like writing. I don't feel like making a blog. But I don't feel like giving up also, which is stronger than this. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to give up 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am stronger than giving up

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that giving up is not an option

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that anything is possible 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that impossible means ‘I'm possible’

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that, it doesn't matter how difficult it gets, I will never give up

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that I am enough to write a blog a day

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that unless I push myself to something it won't be done automatically

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that everything is possible 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that my options are limited

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not think big

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think small

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think I am small

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I am big

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that whether I think I am big or I think I am small, I am right

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself. to fear pain in dying

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that there is pain in dying

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I have endured probably more pain in life than I will in death

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that one thing I will be proud of when I die is if I didn't ever give up

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I cannot help everyone before I help myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that maybe in helping others I will lose myself and then everyone's fucked because I cannot help everyone, I have to help myself first

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to help others instead of helping myself first

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that help is only possible if I assist myself first

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the blog will not be good enough

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that as long as it supports me it's good enough

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that there's no enemies, only self to be directed 

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that there's no fear that can stop me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being unimportant

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be important

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be relevant

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not treat myself as relevant and important to myself, and want it from others