Day 173: Drugs as a Crutch

How come some people take drugs and some other people don't? Some people stop drugs and some other people don't stop them anytime? I think drugs are interesting but they are not worth risking your health to. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to experience things with drugs

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that reality is interesting without drugs too

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to feel cozy

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to feel good.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that these things I look for in ubstances are not the answer in substances

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to take drugs

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to put excuses to take drugs

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that all the things that I look for in drugs I have within

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am missing something 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am incomplete

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I have to be strong and go without drugs

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to bury  feelings of aloneness with drugs

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to take drugs because I am bored 

I forgive myself that I have accepted not myself to put excuses like 'I can take drugs now, it's late and no one will disturb me'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that taking drugs fucks with me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am alone

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that it is an insult to those that are with me to take drugs

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to act as if I am alone