April 24, 2012

Day 11: Self-Responsibility vs. Childish Acting

Day 11:


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not want to take responsibility for myself and complain about my failures to others instead of taking self-responsibility and walking the correction.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want others to take responsibility for myself instead of realizing that in order to change the outcome of what I participate in, I have to change my relationship within that.

I forgive myself that I have NOT accepted and allowed myself to walk the solution that I can work out for myself as to what to do to solve my current situation and problems that I face, but instead decide to remain in failure so that I don't have to change and can continue complaining to others.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I cannot help myself and that others must do this for me.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to love myself enough to take care of myself and the problems I face and instead, project this care to others in wanting another to worry for me for the problems I apparently can't overcome.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to get attention from people within my environment me by repeating to fail on the same points over and over again instead of realizing that I don't need attention from others but from myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed msyelf to believe that getting attention is receiving love/being loved instead of realizing that it's a construct I have designed in order to not take responsibility for myself.

I commit myself to stop acting in a childish way in being irresponsible in the desire to get attention and instead I walk the correction in walking in self-responsibility by directing what I have to do.

I commit myself to stop the cycles of self-abuse in order to be noticed in the realization that I don't need external beings worring for me in order to feel loved but that I require self-assistance and that unless I take the time to assist myself I will keep on believing that I need external love, which is not real.

I commit myself to stop wanting to get attention from outside of myself in failing at what I do.

I commit myself to stand up from self-failure and move to self-application.


April 23, 2012

Day 10: Inevitable



Day 10:

Just like death, to make a future for myself I have to go through education and thus studying is inevitable, I have been avoiding studying which means that I have been sabotaging myself. Time to stop this madness.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to avoid studying eventhough I know it is inevitable that I walk through education to prepare a stable future for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sabotage myself by avoding studying.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to get down to the actual movement of studying.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not act in front of the realization that it is inevitable that I get an education to secure my future.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give up to resistance and fear and not get to the task of studying.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want someone so save myself insted of realizing that I will have the outcome in my life that I create and accept for myself - and that this system that I find myself in has rules that are ruthless and so I have to be ruthless as well with my studies and not waiver and fall every time I am faced with studying.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to risk my standing within my studies by procrastinating studying.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that it is useless to take time for myself to study if I don't study.

Thus:

I commit myself to stop procrastinating on my studies in the realization that 'I will still have to do it later' and that in procrastinating I am risking my standing within my studies.

I commit myself to apply myself within ruthlessnes in my studies by not having compassion with self-pity, fear and self-doubt by stopping myself from participating in them, breathing and getting down to the actual work of studying.

I commit myself to direct myself to push self-discipline with my studies so that I can get effective within my studies and stop the cycle of failure.

I commit myself to stop all regret, anger and shame for not having stopped and studied in the past in the realization that it is a disctraction that again is not taking responsibility for myself.

I commit myself to stop the consequence of not having studied in the past by doing the very thing I did not do = studying.


Featured Art Work by Andrew Gable
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April 22, 2012

Day 9: Nein, No

'Going inside' by Andrew Gable


Day 9:

When saying 'no, I don't need your help' or 'you cannot help me with anything' at the offer of assistance from someone without looking within myself if I need their help or if there is anything which they can assist me is ego. The ego as almighty perception of self in not considering the reality and the fact that there are limitations and that I have to utilize in self honesty the opportunities I have to expand myself and that by myself I can do very little and if I cannot do something by myself, I may let myself be helped so that eventually I can help someone else in a similar position.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to disregard someones assistance without looking within myself if they can assist me to expand myself with some points of myself/my world.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have the perception about myself that I am stronger and better if I do all by myself and that if I let myself be helped I am weak.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have to consider everything in my world from the starting point of the principle of what is best for all, including the offers of help I may get.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not want to be helped so that I don't change and can continue playing the victim and not taking responsibility for myself and my world.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to humble myself in realizing that I am in no way almighty and that not wanting to get helped is a protection for the mind to remain in control in my continuation to give up self-direction.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to reply to an offer for help from the starting point of protecting my ego as my personality and self-definition about myself of being self-sufficient instead of the starting point of what's best for all - I realize that I have not proved this to myself - that I am self sufficient - and I can see it in how I have no control over all the outcomes of my life and death.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that 'wanting to make it by myself' is a statement of ego that prolong my process unnecesarily.

I commit myself to consider every offer of assistance that I get in looking at it in terms of how can it support me to walk within the principle of what is best for all - before replying to the offer, as I realize that it is best for all that I utilize all that is available in order to put myself in a position where I can effectively walk my process.

I commit myself to stop sabotaging myself by refusing to get help that could assist me in my process - as I realize that I can't be certain that the same offer will be available when if I want it in the future, so I commit myself to take the time to assess every offer of help.


Featured Art Work by Andrew Gable
Facebook Link - http://www.facebook.com/andrewgableartist
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Blog Links:
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April 21, 2012

Day 8: Last Minute Movement

Artwork by Andrew Gable
Day 8:

What is up with me studying always at the last moment? Preventing me from studying or moving myself in general until the last moment to then rush through the experience of 'getting there' in fear of not being able to 'get there' like in having an exam = is  boosting my mind-energy by deliberately postpoinig starting an activity until I am not certain wether I will be able to make it or not due to the little time availabe, where I can blame not having studied much as the reason to give to myself if I don't pass the exam.

This is a form of not trusting myself because I let myself postpone until a point where I am not sure if I will succeed at the task I have to do, to have an excuse if I don't complete the task in time or if don't get the result I wanted with the task, by saying  the excuse that I did not prepare myself with enough time.

This is not giving myself the opportunity to finish the points and see for myself if I am effective or not REALLY, because by doing stuff at the last minute I am jumping and skimming through the task I have to do and never get deep into it, so I can't be specific and get the thing done apporpiately. In doing this I make myself to fail at the task and then judge myself - and all this done in self-interest to not have to face myself, because if I prove to myself with this manipulation that I am not able to do something when I fail the task, apparently I don't have to face myself within the task that I failed due to not letting myself work through the requiered points to do it with enough time and dedication put into it.

All the points in the past where I failed at my studies, for instance, I did not prepare myself effectively. This is an ego point because if I were to prepare myself for an exam, and then the result were a fail, then I would take it personally.

In procrastinating and doing stuff at the last moment if I fail I utilize the excuse that I didn't have time/I didn't start in time so it's not my fault, apparently, it's not that 'I am not able to do it' it's just that 'I have not given myself enough time to do it' and 'if I give myself enough time to do it, I can do it' but I never do give myself enough time, so I can never prove myself that I can. So, this is utter bullshit mutliplied by infinite because by not wanting to find myself in the position where I applied myself to get a result for instance in my studies - and then I get the opposite result to what I wanted to have = I take it personally as in 'I am not able to do it/I am therefore stupid/dumb/less than those that can do it'. In fear of finding myself in the position where I apply myself to get a point done and fail it, I deliberately put myself in that position by  not giving myself time to apply myself within it so that at the end I don't see it as a 'personal' fault/defect of myself but that I can blame it due to not having enough time.

See, by fearing to find myself in the realization that I could not pass an exam eventhough I studied thoroughly I am putting myself in the position where I do fail the exams - but my ego remains intact with excuses. Here I have to take a decision, wheter I give up Ego and put myself to the test in studying and going to the exam and seeing if I pass it or not, or procrastinate, not prepare myself and fail at the exam (or not) and if not, be able to blame that I did no thave enough time.

Since Ego is not real and my marks at school do have an impact on what I can do in this reality, I'll rather stop this Ego insanity trip and realize that even if I apply myself and study and then fail, it only means that 1: I have not been applying myself effectively and/or 2:I have to keep pushing and applying myself within the points I've been walking so that I am prepared to pass the exam.

Here some Self Forgiveness to move myself from Ego to best for all self-movement.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live as and for Ego, in order to preserve it, even if I have to fail at my exams in order for it to be left 'untouched'.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deliberately procrastinate to apply myself in studiyng until it is the last minute so that if I fail, I don't have to blame myself but I can blame not having enough time - instead of realizing that the end result is the same: Not passing the exam - and thus the point of preserving something that is not real - Ego - is not valid at all but extensive self-abuse and self-manipulation.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear realizing that I am not able to pass an exam.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within the fear of not being able to pass an exam, participate/design a system to protect my Ego that consists in not preparing myself effectively for the exam so that if I fail, I can blame not having studied/not having studied enough as the cause for not passing the exam, so that I can maintain the illusion and self-image and self-judgement of myself as intelligent - and where if I pass, I can congratulate myself and boost my ego with the thought and the speaking and sharing the 'epic tale' that I passed the exam 'eventhough I studied at the last moment/I studied very little'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I pass an exam having studied for a short period of time it means that I am better than others, wiser and clever.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that this strategy of studying at the last moment is nothing of clever or wise but self-sabotage to not have to face myself if I don't pass the exam after studying/putting effort in studying.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I prepare myself for an exam and I don't pass that exam, I am stupid and I have reached the point where I know that THAT is my limit.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear realizing that I have reached the maximum that I can do within my studies, instead of realizing that studying is like any form of training where if one trains one gets better at it and so the effectiveness in exams increases through application.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I study for an exam and don't pass it, I am then not able to pass it - instead of realizing that I can integrate the knowledge and how-to necessary to pass the exam with my application in studying.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to procrastinate studying until it is the last minute in fear that if I study and don't pass the exam it will mean that I am not good enough.

I forgive myeslf that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as not good enough and want to cover it by not applying myself in studying until it is too late so that when I don't pass the exam I can blame it on not having had enough time to study.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to miantain an illusion self-judgement about myself as wise and intelligent and fear this belief being shattered by putting effort and time to studying and then getting a bad result on the exam.

I forgive mysel that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that in order to be successful at my studies I have to walk step by step the applicaiton of myself within studying so that it accumulates each day.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that unless I put the time and effort to study I will not see what I need to change - or not - in order to pass the exams and in order to get better at studying and in order to actually pass the course.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make something that is not real as Ego and Fear of failing real - in reacting to my fear of seeing myself fail despite my effort for passing an exam - by not studying until it's too late so that I can blame not passing the exam on not having had enough time to study.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that failing exists and that if I don't pass an exam it means that I have failed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take it personally when I don't pass an exam and that I have accepted and allowed myself to deliberately not prepare my exams in order to be able to blame my 'unpreparedness' so that I don't have to see myself as stupid/dumb and less than those that passed it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear seeing myself as imperfect and not able to pass through an exam if I have studied for it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I prepare myself for an exam and don't pass it = it means that I am dumb, stupid and less than those that did pass it - instead of realizing that I need more application and that my effectiveness and direction is not enough and needs expansion through self-application.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself believe that if I study for an exam with what I percieve as 'enough time' and dedication and then I don't pass it it means that I have failed and therefore I am - and have to judge myself as - defective, dumb, stupid and 'less than' those that passed the exam.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sabotage myself in fear of not passing an exam if I have studied for it in fear of breaking the believe and self-judgement about myself that I am smart, intelligent and clever.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as smart, intelligent and clever and want to keep this created self-image and believe about myself by not walking through an experience where I see that I am the opposite of it: dumb, stupid and less-than others

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place a polarity in passing or not passing an exam where if I don't pass I am stupid/dumb and less than others that pass it and if I pass I am clever, intelligent and smart.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sort-out the polarity I placed within passing or not passing an exam by not studying until the last minute/until it's too late so that I don't have to blame myself for not passing by using the excuse that I did not have time -instead of realizing that the net result of doing this is failing most or all the exams I present myself to and that if I fail an exam that I have prepared it does not mean that I am therefore a stupid, dumb and inferior being than those that did pass it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to procrastinate in studying for my exams so that there is no opportunity to shatter the self-image and belief about myself that I am clever, intelligent and smart because if I don't pass I utilize the excuse of not having prepared myself and if I do pass I can judge myself as smart, intelligent and clever for having passed eventhough I had very little time to study -  in both cases feeding my Ego as self definitions.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I have to define myself as better or worse in relation to how I perform at my studies.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have defined myself according to how I perform at my studies.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to enslave myself by the fear of being unable of practically passing my studies/exams and within this separate myself from my studies and in doing this create an alternate reality where I always win and I don't have to face myself with practicality/the physical reality of studying that requires step by step application.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to choose being a winner in my mind and a failure at my studies than to apply myself at my studies and deal with self-judgements in my mind.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as a failure for not having passed exams/courses of my studies in the past..

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not humble myself by walking the studying in time that is necessary to prepare an exam effectively and going to the exam and thus exposing the believes about myself to be broken if I do fail the exam/not pass the exam.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within wanting to preserve my self image and perception about myself as clever create a system where that perception as my ego is never challenged by having excuses as to why I didn't pass and also being able to boost this perception-narcissistic idea about myself of being clever if I do pass by saying to myself that I am such a clever guy for having passed an exam with little time to study.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that If I pass an exam I am smarter than if I don't pass it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not give myself the full opportunity to pass an exam by not studying and doing all that is required to prepare myself effectively within the limitations of physical reality and instead preserve my Ego as self definition of being superior as smart and clever in placing the excuse of not having had time to study in studying at the last minute so that if I fail in passing the exam my ego remains intact.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place value in my self definition of clever to the point of creating myself to risk to fail all the exams I do by studying at the last moment.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the point where this system of studying at the last minute worked had to reach an end as I moved through the stages of education where the difficulty and specificity and the time required and effort required is increased - so that I would not be able to pass by studying at the last minute as a selection process of the education system so that only a few can get and pass through higher education as a filter so that not everyone can get to the top of it and only those that managed to apply themselves effectively get there.

I realize that I am not a failure for having failed exams or repeated study years.

I commit myself to stop sabotaging myself in participating in my mind as perceptions about myself but to deal with my studies at the practical level of the physical by not allowing the mind to fuck up with myself by breathing through my application.

I commit myself to stop judging myself according to the results I get at my studies.

I commit myself to stop fearing my own self judgement by stopping it when I see it in what I do - as I realize that not moving myself to study is judging myself as incapable of passing an exam and a mechanism that protects my ego so that if I don't get to pass the exam, I can blame not having had time to study as the cause of not passing the exam instead of having to change myself.

I commit myself to change myself to become effective at my studies instead of using self-deception and blame to not have to take responsibility for my studies.

I commit myself to stop whenever I see that I am going again to procrastination in order to blame not having had time to study.

I commit myself to study as I realize that in studying I am stopping my ego by not giving me a 'way out' through blaming 'not having had time to study' as the reason of failing the exams - as I realize that by the mere fact that I procrastinate studying until it's the last moment/too late = I am in fact wasting time and thus I cannot claim in any way whatsoever that I did not have enough time, as I procrastinated and wasted the time available to study.


April 20, 2012

Day 7: Self-Judgement

Day 7:

I reacted to someone saying to themself 'stupid' with the thought in my mind of: 'don't say that to yourself' so there must be a point where I am judging myself and I will take it back to the point of my studies. It is best for all I do some self forgiveness on this point.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as unefficient with my studies for having failed in the past.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to someone judging themself with the thought 'don't say that to yourself' instead of seeing that I am somewhere judging myself and that I am projecting outside of myself by wanting another to stop judging themself instead of me stopping my self-judgement.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as a failure for not having passed exams in the past and having to re-do the same course.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to link not passing a school-year with the word 'failure'.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as a failure in self interest to not have to face myself with studying.
 
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to utilize self-judement as an excuse to why I don't have to walk the correction within my studies but instead give-up because of accepting the definition of being a failure.

I forgive myself that  I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I can 'be a failure' instead of realizing that it is not who I really am -it's only an accepted self-definition of limitation that is not real.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limt myself by juging myself as a failure.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as stupid.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sabotage myself by defining myself as stupid instead of realizing that it is self-manipulation in self-dishonesty to not have to walk through the point of studying.

I commit myself to stop self-sabotaging myself with self-judgement by identigying where I judge myself and stopping and correcting it with self-forgiveness and practical application.

I commit myself to stop manipulating myself by judging myself so that I do not have to face myself within school but instead throw a spanner in the works.




Featured Art Work by Andrew Gable
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April 19, 2012

Day 6: Fear of the Past and Fear of the Future





When I have a second chance with my studies I fear to fuck up again by not studying so I have to forgive myself for not having studied in the past and fearing to repeat it - not studying - again.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I am directing myself in studying or in not studying and thus it is my responsibility wether I study or not.

I forgive myself that I have accetped and allowed myself to fear not studying again when given another opportunity.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that fearing to 'fuck up' again is accepting the enslavement to my past instead of realizing that I created the past experiences and that I can change so that I don't repeat them.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hold on the past by looking back and fearing that I will not study again this time - instead of stopping myself, forgiving myself and walkig the correction I set for myself.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that 'failing at my studies' is a mere indication that my application and specificity and self-direction is not sufficient and that I have to work on these points to expand myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as a loser because I have failed an exam instead of realizing that it's an opportunity to expand myself in the points of myself that need to be adressed so that I am effective at the task.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to accept the worst possible outcome within participating in my studies  - that is not passing the course - and from here walk and apply myself to the best of my hability so that I can pass.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to deliberately not apply myself with my studies so that I dont' have to take responsibility for myself. I stop this obvious self-sabotage by taking responsibility for myself by studiyng and not giving up as I realize that giving up would be again self-sabotage.

I commit myself to stop fearing the past and instead forgive myself and walk the correction required.

I commit myself to stop whenever I am judging myself as I realize that I created myslef to fail in the first place and that I am able create myself to not fail as well.

I commit myself to take responsibility for myself within my studies asI realize that I don't have to pity myself for having failed at my studies in the past as I realize that it is self-sabotage. Instead I stand up for myself and walk the correction until it's done.

I commit myself to stop my starting point within my studies from not wanting to take responsibility for myself to taking responsibility for myself in aplying myself to create myself to succeed at my studies.

I commit myself to continue to apply myself if I don't get to pass at my studies and instead of giving up I utilize them as an opportunity to support myself in expanding myself.

I commit myself to live by the realization that when I fail it is an experience that I have to go through to see that which I was not willing to see about myself - the points that I was not giving attention to - and so they had to show on physical real-time events so that I stop my self dishonesty and correct myself.

I commit myself to not take personally the points where I perceive I have done wrong or failed but instead forgive myself and let go of the point and continue with my application - as I realize that it is a process and I will stumble and fall but the key is that I dont give up but continue pushing no matter what.


April 18, 2012

Day 5: Excuses



Day 5:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to put excuses to not have to immediately walk that which I know I have to do and instead give up by talking reasons and explanations in my mind.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to sort out the obstacles that I find to the task I have to do but instead make up excuses in my mind as why I cannot continue with my application.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the obsticles that I find look bigger in my mind and that I can work out a solution and walk it if I don't allow myself to feel overwhelmed by my mind and give up.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that the energy of resistance and overwhelmednes that I experience is not real but that it will look like it is until I actually walk through it and do the task I resist.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give up windows of opportunity in my life/process in giving up my application to the resistance in my mind and the feeling of overwhelmedness/'it's too much'

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to prove to myself that I can walk through that wich I perceive I cannot accomplish by giving up to the mind before I start in making excuses and within that giving up my entire self-direction and undermining my self-trust.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that the fact that I resist a point means that I have allowed myself to be controlled by my mind and that it is my responsibility to stop it.

I commit myself to stop terrorizing myself by making excuses in my mind to give up.

I commit myself to stop sabotaging myself through giving up and instead I give myself the opportunity to walk throgh that application/task that I resist  in realizing that it is a window of opportunity for myself to transcend a point where I allowed myself to be controlled by my mind.

I commit myself to stop wanting the world to change and change myself in fact, by not acting like I have always done to the things that I resist but by walking through them and changing myself in fact, in the flesh, breath by breath.

I commit myself to stop empowering my mind by giving up whenever I have the opportunity but instead stand up for myself in finding solutions that enable me to walk effectively within that which I have to do.



April 17, 2012

Day 4: Self-Love

Day 4:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in a reality where the attention is placed outside of self onto others for fulfillment without questioning it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within placing the attention ouside of myself desire others to give attention to me in not realizing that I am disregarding myself in the first place.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate without question in a system where the thought exist of 'nobody loves me' instead each being realizing that it is about self-love and self-acceptance and each one giving attention to themselves first.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I could not find fulfillment/acceptance/love completely outside of myself in others because it is only real as self-fulfillment, self-acceptance, self-love and that unless I do it for myself it will never last and I will never be satisfied with this points.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to utilize excuses to not have to take care of myself and instead distract myself in relationships/interaction with other people and things where I believe I am helping - without realizing that it is not unconditionaly done and thus in self-interest because I am doing so to forget that I am in fact not assisting and supporting myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make an estatment of Ego in wanting to help others - by implying that I have nothing to solve of myself and to correct of myself but instead playing the 'saviour' that is always a from a superiority standing and starting point and not of Equality with the one that I 'try to' assist.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to give a self-honest look at myself and my world in fear of myself and try to hide up the fact that I am not assisting myself by trying to assist others.

I commit myself to myself to walk in self-honesty in checking where my attention is going to make sure that I am not diverting my attention from that which is Best for All in realizing that otherwise I am only feeding my Ego.

I commit myself to regard and consider myself and take time to support myself effectively.

I commit myself to stop whenever I see that I am looking for love, care and acceptance outside of myself in realizing that it's merely an indication that I am not giving this to myself and that it is not an actual real lack that needs external fulfillment in realizing that I do not need the experience of energy as love/care as I don't consist of this energy - only my mind of system does - I require instead real self-assistance in giving me back to myself by walking this process of self forgiveness and practical walking application in every moment of breath.


April 16, 2012

Day 3: Walking Through Consequence

Day 3:

The pain of having to walk though one's own created consequence is necessary - until there is no more pain. I found myself fearing to walk my own created consequence with my studies and I saw that if I allowed this fear to make me back up from walking my own consequence, I'd be creating more of it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear walking through my own consequence instead of realizing that it is the only way of stopping it, even if it means to suffer a little bit.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear suferring in walking my own created consequence instead of realizing that that which is real cannot be harmed or lost.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within the fear of not having a successful outcome from walking my consequence/not being certain I will succeed at walking it = not want to walk it by giving excuses.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see that there are no excuses valid to not walk through my own self created consequences and thus all excuses are self-deception.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to consider the power I have as a creator and thus I have to first stop what I have already created through walking it's consequences towards the point that I have stopped my creation in separation from myself and I can create myself from the starting point of nothingness within the principle of that which is Best for All Life Always.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I can walk through the pain and suffering that I may experience in walking the consequence I've created in my reality.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to disregard my Breath as a stabilizing tool that I can utilize to walk through my manifested consequence in stability and in self-direction.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted or allowed myself to see that there is an end to my mind and that I can let it be sooner than my physical death in walking my journey to Life.

I commit myself to walk through my self-created consequence in walking through it in pain or joy as it comes in every moment of breah.

I commit myself to stabilize myself within breath by applying myself as breath as a tool to direct myself to walk myself step by step out of my consequence from the past to the point of nothingness.

I commit myself to utilize my past mistakes and slip-off's to learn from them and to not have to repeat them again in the future and I commit myself to not utilize the mistakes and slip-off's to enslave myelf to my past as the mind with regret or shame or self-pity.

I commit myself to give myself the opportunity to stand up for myself breath by breath until I have stopped all pain within and without.



Featured Art Work by Marlen Vargas Del Razo

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http://marlenvargasdelrazo.wordpress.com
http://www.marlenlife.wordpress.com

April 15, 2012

Day 2: Procrastination

Day 2


Self forgiveness and corrective statements to stop the accepted illusion of limitation that is procrastination, the feeling of inferiority and giving up. Part 1.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to procrastinate on doing my tasks to not have to face them.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that doing the tasks on overtime/after the deadline is not any different than doing them on time .

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see that the fear of not getting the task done right is not real - and that it only affects my hability to do the tasks if I allow it.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to regard myself as one and equal to the task I have to do but instead diminish myself by seeing myself as incapable of doing it .

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that unless I take a look at what is the task I have to do and walk it accordingly, it won't go away.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to give me the opportunity to see what would happen if I'd walk through all the resistances towards the tasks I have to do.

I commit myself to engage the tasks I have to do at the moment I have available without delay - in the realization that it's the easiest and most effective way to do it.

I commit myself to stop the delusion that it's easier and more comfortable to procrastinate on the tasks I have to do, in the realization that there's always a consequence to all my actions and within this I decide to choose the consequence that is Best for All, best for me as Life.

I commit myself to let go of the fear and resistance and make the choice to stand up for myself when I am faced with tasks I have to do by doing them effectively without trying to escape from them as I realize that it's impossible to escape from myself.

I commit myself to prove to myself that I am not less than the tasks I have to do by walking through them an within this prove to myself that I stand no matter what.

I commit myself to walk through the illusion that is the feeling of inferiority, procrastination and fear by standing up for myself and breathing through this experiences and prove to myself that they are not real and that I remain.



Featured Art Work by Marlen Vargas Del Razo

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Blogs:

April 14, 2012

Day 1: Nowhere to Hide

Day 1

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try to hide from myself in sleeping more than I need in the belief that I can hide from myself and the consequence of not studying by oversleeping.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge studying as difficult to not have to face it, using my past experiences of failing at my studies as an excuse to not have to correct myself and apply myself in studying.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to act on my fear of failing at my studies every time I postpone studying - instead of walking through my fear and pratically studying.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let the fear of failing my studies to control me.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not give myself the opportunity to walk through the fear of failing at my studies and instead, give up trying/walking the necessary steps to be successful at my studies.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize that by not studying I am sabotaging myself and perpetuating the state of failure that I find myself in.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to realize that I can't hide from myself and the consequence of not studying - and that it is up to myself to create an outcome within my studies that is best for me instead of squandering my opportunities to get an education.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see/realize/understand that it is within facing what I fear and resist that I am able to face who and what I have become to be able to stop it and stand up for myself within my studies.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not face myself in walking through my fears towards studying in walking the principle of what is Best for All Life - and within this:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to put myself down in not assisting and supporting myself in being able to sustain myself effectively in the system of the world by/through getting an education that will enable myself to get a job to live effectively and self-sufficiently.

I forgive myself that I haven't accepted and allowed myself to see that by procrastinating on studying I am creating the very thing I fear - to fail at my studies - and that through walking through this fear = is the only way I can stop myself and change the outcome of my studies.

I realize that I cannot hide from myself, and I commit myself to stop trying to hide from myself. I stop my participation in fear of failing at school by stopping myself when the fear arise by breathing and instead of running away in fear: I move myself to effectively walk the steps necessary to be effective at my studies, and I give myself the opportunity to succeed at them.

I stand up from the fear of failing at school in the simplicity of breathing and acting, in the realization that if I don't do this I won't be able to support myself in the money system. I stand up for myself within my studies to be able to walk effectively within the principle of what's Best for All Life.

Artwork by Andrew Gable

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