June 26, 2013

Day 94: Stars Aligned - Start a Line

Today has been quite a 'ride' because I have both passed the course of Environmental Chemistry that I have been doing the past few years and also have decided to start at university Agricultural Engineering. This is some self-forgiveness on jumpiness/overexcitement - lol - and more.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to forget to breathe when I give or receive 'good news'.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to obtain recognition for having passed at my studies.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to risk not passing at my studies by studying at the last moment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that because I have passed, somehow I have won.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become obsessed with the point of having passed, instead of seeing that it is merely an opportunity to keep walking.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I rejoice/indulge too much in the experience of having passed that I forget to apply myself effectively in continuing my studies at university.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I go into 'shock' somehow and forget to direct myself effectively in my reality now that I have passed at my studies.

Whenever I see that I am not here as breath when communicating with others, I stop and I breathe. I realize that my point of stability is within breathing.

I commit myself to remain within self-stability by applying myself within breathing.

Whenever I see that I want recongizion from others, I stop and I breathe. I realize that I can give to myself recognition, so I investigate where it is that I don't recognize myself.

I commit myself to investigate the instances where I want to obtain recognition form others, to give to myself that which I place out there, outside of myself.

Whenever I see that I participate in procrastination within my studies, I stop and I breathe. I realize that procrastination will lead to consequence, therefore I stop and direct myself in common sense.

I commit myself to direct me in my reality within common sense as what is Best for All.

Whenever I see that I am participating in 'positive' energy, I stop and I breathe. I realize that positive experiences as energy are a polarity of negative. Both are not real.

I commit myself to breathe through the positive experiences, and investigate them in writing to ground myself so that I don't fool myself within energy delusions.

Whenever I see that I become obsessed about the past of having passed, I stop and I breathe. I realize that the past is gone, both for what was a 'good experience' and what was a 'bad experience' according to me - and thus only have what is here to work with. Within this, I commit myself to remain here as breath, directing myself within physical stability in common sense and practicality.

Whenever I see that I fear over-rejoicing for having passed at my studies, I stop and I breathe. I realize that it is cool to celebrate, although I must keep walking within common sense, to not unnecessarily distract myself from what is here to do in every moment to live effectively.

I commit myself to consider in every moment what it is that I am participating in, to make sure that I am grounded here as physical breathe and not somewhere up there in my mind as energy - then I don't have to fear, because I make sure that I am Here with me in this physical reality.

Whenever I see that I fear that I go into shock for having passed at my studies, I stop and I breathe. I realize that it is my responsibility to remain Here as breath in every moment, that this will assist me greatly, so I apply myself within it and see that I am Here. 

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