Day 171: Let Go of Control

If I achieved what I wanted, maybe I would not be here. I would be doing some things that are irrelevant for my life and for the life of others. I am here, I apply myself, I write blogs. Maybe if I had success in some ways that I wanted, I would not be applying myself consistently.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to control everything

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can't let go

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to cling to everything

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want the outcome of things to be how I want

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not let go

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe things have to be how I want, instead of seeing, realizing, and understanding that things, even when they don't go as I planned, can be even better

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I am not the one to decide what will happen next

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel powerless whenever things don't go as I planned

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that how I am right now is maybe the best way I have

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that without the things that I want, maybe I am better

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear I will never have a family of my own

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I have to create a life for myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see the potential that I have

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear misery

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I will do the best I can wherever I am

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that I am all that I have

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to believe I am alone

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not choose always what's best for all and for me, thus.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I don't control outcomes, I am not in control or it's not the best, while this is not so

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I have to let things be

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear consequence from my actions

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to play God by wanting my outcome to be the real one

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the most effort doesn't mean the best choice.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear having to do a lot of effort if I choose what's best for all.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that only that which is not real stops existing

Day 170: The Wall Inside

The wall inside can be many things. For me it's about limiting beliefs mostly and accepted things without investigating them. Limitations like thinking I'm not worth it 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the challenges I have are a present for me so that if I overcome them, I get that present

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I have to simply work on myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let myself down every day

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not believe in myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to disregard myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I need more money to be someone

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I need more studies to be someone

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I need to change my body type to be someone

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I have to do something special to be someone

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am special

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I have a bigger purpose

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand how I do little things is how I will do bigger things

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not do that which I see will be giving me the most benefit to myself, not money exclusively 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that if I do my best I will get somewhere

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to disregard myself as someone that can make it in this life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can make it in this life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not even try with all my heart to overcome my challenges

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not stand up when I wake up from the bed

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to let myself down whenever I don't wake up and stand up

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am not worth it of the good things in life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I have to suffer

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to beat myself up for no reason

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I don't have to beat myself up

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I have to explore about myself, keep that which is good and let go of the rest

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand the phrase, 'investigate everything and keep what's good'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I have to invest in myself and tools that will help me overcome any addiction and any limitation

Day 169: Change or Not Change

For up until now, I have thought of myself that I do not change. I want change and I think I don't change. 

Well, I have been abstaining from drugs for over a year. That's change, that's something new. So I have to be less hard on myself and acknowledge the positive changes I've made and see that I can make many more.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I am always changing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that change is not something in the future, but a constant doing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear forgetting myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand how much I have changed in recent times

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not acknowledge my change

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think that I don't change

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I either change positively im a good way or negatively, either I change through consequence, or I change through choice

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am shit

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand how much I have changed

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not acknowledge the fact that I've been drug free for over a year

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to be hard on myself 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that my self beliefs are not real

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am a fuck-up

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I don't and can't change 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to be impatient about change 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that progress is made when I think I am not making progress 

I commit myself to be patient and easygoing with myself

I commit myself to remind myself I am always changing either consciously or un-consciously 

I commit myself to direct change to what's best for All starting with what's best for me

Day 168: The Power of No

They say that Google tried to sell the company many many times or many attempts and they didn't sell it so they stuck with it and now it's a giant. 

Today I want to talk about the No's, the no's are what makes one find their way. It avoids the way that they should not go. I think that when we get no's is because there is another way, better way for us. 

And also there is something to learn when we get a no. For example in sales, every time we get a no we have something to improve, something we missed. I think that.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be 'allergic to No's'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear no's, to fear rejection

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that every rejection I get, I learn and I get stronger

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that if I got a yes every time I want to do something, I would be doing anything instead of what's the best

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can learn from every no

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe, that in learning you have to avoid mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to avoid making mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that making mistakes is how I can learn the fastest

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe if I don't make mistakes I am doing better, when in fact it's not so

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear making mistakes,  because apparently they are bad

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge mistakes as bad

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe it's better not making mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not embrace making mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am less if I make mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe my self-value depends on how many mistakes I make

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that in the real world when you make a lot of mistakes you are closer to the goal

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe perfection is not making mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not give myself space to make mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being judged if I make mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I have to do something right the first time

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that to improve I need to make mistakes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not knowing what to say

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I have to do everything alone 

I forgive myself that they have accepted and allowed myself to believe it's being weak when one asks for help from someone else

I forgive myself that I have accepted around myself to believe seeking help is being weak

I forgive myself that I have accepted around myself to not see that the more competitive people have teams

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being in a team

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that participating in a team can be good

Day 167: Fear of Being Homeless

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being homeless

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having any support

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear suffering

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to both fear remaining a wage slave and homeless

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to belief I can only be an employee

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can improve myself to do different things to get money from

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having enough to eat

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that a normal so-called job gets most of my time

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that with a normal life I will have a very poor retirement

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I will suffer if I am merely an employee

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I should create my own business

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that without money I will suffer

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that this world is cut-throat about money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am my own limitations

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can change my mindset, to change my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to simply accept my limitations

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I have been programmed to lose

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I have to reprogram myself to win

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I cannot get good habits

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear that I will be fat the rest of my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that I can become fit

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that it is not about being worried about money, but about doing something

Day 166: Facing Life in Self-Forgiveness

 Here is a bit of my life in self-forgiveness, my fears, my insecurities and how to build a new life for me free from pointless jobs. How I do it? I don't know. I just know that I can do it one breath at a time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to have everything smooth sailing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being poor

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I don't have to be far away from home to get money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I don't have to suffer necessarily to make money 

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe i can only do one type of job

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not give myself the opportunity to learn something new or a degree to change careers

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see realize and understand that I am free to do what I want - not without responsibility but I have freedom

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see realize and understand that if where I am I am not satisfied, I can change it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I cannot get a job somewhere else

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am the beginning and the end

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am not forced to do anything in this world at all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hate my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be self-honest with myself that I hate my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take drugs to avoid living, in the life that I hate

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe others will think I am taking drugs which I am not since one year

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that drugs gave me companionship and that's one reason why I used them

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that now I have the real power to build the life that I really want

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want a relationship

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see realize and understand that I have to be patient

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see realize and understand that I have opportunities and I can use them

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that there's not always and there will not be forever opportunities for myself, maybe

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that death doesn't care about my timetables, my schedules, it just arrives

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that time doesn't stop for me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I have specialness in me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I will become someone relevant

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that if I don't do relevant things, I will become irrelevant

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not trust myself and take drugs in the past to avoid reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to manifest consequences for my drug taking

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see realize and understand that my fuck-ups are for me to solve

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that even if it takes time I can overcome consequence

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that if I want another life I have to build it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want the attention of others

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear this blog will be too short or too long

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to care about others instead of care about myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that if everyone cares for themselves first, then everyone is cared for

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that the job where I am at is not the end of the train track for my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand, that I remain

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that no matter what happens, no matter how bad it gets, I will stand up for myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear consequence

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to put as an excuse that I fear something, to not face it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I don't fear anything - at all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I can program my life to be the best that it can be

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear and to believe that I cannot do more in this life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear I will not have enough money if I have consequence playing out in my reality

Day 165: Discipline and Balance

Discipline is not banging my head to the wall, although it could be if I had set that as a goal lol, I see that discipline is doing what I said - to me or others - until I'm done. 

I see I didn't fully understand Discipline and it seemed to me it came from the outside, when it has to come 'from within/from me' for Me, as something that I use to complete my goals, commitments and agreements.

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I cannot be disciplined

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe discipline is hard

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that discipline is habit

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that whatever I allow to do in one day, I allow to do in many

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear boredom if I am disciplined

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that on the other side of discipline is what I really want in my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I cannot be disciplined with food

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I cannot go back to be thin

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the future

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not discipline myself into being Here at all times aware

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am not worthy of being realized

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I don't deserve to have a good life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am sinful

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am a sinner

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I have to be gentle and easy on myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I don't have to have wants in this life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can choose whatever I want to experience in this life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can decide what I want to do in this life and do it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that once I am dead it's too late

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand I am so hard on myself that I don't even want to want anything

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not want to experience anything in this world

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not explore what it is that I want to experience in this world

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see that discipline is to do what I say I was going to do and nothing else 

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that whatever I commit to do is what I have to do with discipline

Day 164: Lazy Gets Nothing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge what I say. Okay, no judgement, only me and you, here, in this moment, no fluff, all grain.

I have a friend that when he's with me all the time he thinks what can I say that is interesting. He comes up with stuff that to me is boring. So I will not try to come up with anything interesting to you because maybe you will find it boring. So, did you know that who doesn't want to change their life because he thinks he's too fucked up.

is because he's lazy and don't want to rearrange everything inside themself? Because like today I was at work and we work with packages of furniture in... on... on pallets and I was saying to my colleague this pallet is fucked up I need to do something with it,

or change a new one. He said that you are lazy you don't want to change it, from take it apart. 

So it's like in life one has to take it apart, pause, stop for a moment, stop with capital letters and then slowly slowly

deconstruct ourselves, slowly slowly, stop ourselves when there's nothing, you reach the point of nothingness and from here we go up up not in the sense of higher but in the sense of building ourselves the way we want to be and this is what I'm doing with these blogs.

thank you very much

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be lazy

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not want to face my life head on and apply myself in changing myself with the tools available

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am capable of changing myself and so must do it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to put excuses to not apply myself and change myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear, Missing out on everything on life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be interesting to others

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be, Interesting for others instead of being interesting for myself

I commit myself to remind myself that I must make myself interesting for myself only

I commit myself to remind myself that I am with myself always so I Should become interesting for myself not for others

Day 163: Con-ditioned

 I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to diminish myself in my daily living. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I don't have to diminish myself at all. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am freedom.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I don't have to condition myself to anyone else 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be gentle

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not go easy on myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe it will not work if I am not feeling it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I don't need to have any feeling for me to apply self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe the thoughts I have about self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand the gift that is self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not forgive myself for real

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe resistance to applying self-forgiveness is real

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that it doesn't matter if it feels difficult, I have to apply self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I must forgive myself to let go of the past and limitations

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself, in the past, to want to be close to people with money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can be the one that makes money

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that self-limitations can be in many aspects of self

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I am here in every moment of breath, aware, present

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that my father is always with me, no matter what

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that all my loved ones, my grandfather, all are with me at all times

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not honor the support that I have been receiving

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to act as if I don't have support from the hereafter

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I have to explain myself instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that first of all I have to understand myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to act as if I am alone when I am alone

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand the phrase 'everything is known at all times'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear sounding mind washed

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that you are brainwashed if you don't apply self-forgiveness and change

Day 162: Percieved Limitations

 

So what are or do you have limitations? Then if you don't have limitations let's do what's best for all. If you cannot do that it means you have limitations.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing the belief that I have limitations

I forgive myself for not seeing that the world is only limited by physical laws and nothing else

I forgive myself for not seeing, realizing, and understanding that those who claim what's best for all is impossible are simply winning for themselves and not wanting everyone to win

I forgive myself for not seeing, realizing, and understanding that we have no excuse not to do what's best for all

I forgive myself for not seeing, realizing, and understanding that only those who are comfortable will not want everyone to be comfortable

I forgive myself for not seeing, realizing, and understanding that what's best for all is not selfish

I forgive myself for not seeing, realizing, and understanding that we can organize ourselves to create a world that's best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand the limitations of those that say that what's best for all is not possible

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand the extent of the brainwashing that there is nowadays, where no one regards what's best for all and everyone lives in self-interest only

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand the extent to which I have been brainwashed to not consider what's best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that in common sense we are all equal and we all deserve the same things to take care of ourselves.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see the simplicity in common sense of we have to be there for each other

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the resources on earth should be allocated to the inhabitants of the planet, everyone included

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to become rich and in my quest disregard everything else and Equality for All

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that unless I stand up for myself, nothing magical will happen

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that there is no magical way into a world that's best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I will die, and when I die, I will regret not having stood up for myself and for All as Equals as Life

Day 161: Self-Forgiveness 1 - 100

1. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not love myself.

 

2. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear and judge self-forgiveness as difficult.

 

3. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take self-forgiveness seriously.

 

4. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear what will happen if I apply self-forgiveness correctly, adequately.

 

5. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see the use and the value of self-forgiveness.

 

6. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe self-forgiveness is only theoretical and not practical.

 

7. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to do self-forgiveness for others instead of doing it for myself.

 

8. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that unless I apply self-forgiveness for myself, it will be of no value.

 

9. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear what others will think of my self-forgiveness statements.

 

10. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that it doesn’t matter what others think of me.

 

11. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear it is too late for me to apply self-forgiveness.

 

12. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that it doesn’t matter how long self-forgiveness is, but what’s the content in it.

 

13. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear failing or “fucking up” with self-forgiveness.

 

14. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I am free to create myself as the best that I can be.

 

15. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to rush doing self-forgiveness.

 

16. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I can apply self-forgiveness at my own pace.

 

17. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame my past for my present instead of understanding it and changing it.

 

18. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that the past cannot be changed but it can be understood and processed effectively so that it doesn’t affect me now.

 

19. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that drugs are not the way in life.

 

20. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that unless I live self-forgiveness, it is useless.

 

21. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that self-honesty is the key with self-forgiveness.

 

22. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that mistakes are part of the learning process.

 

23. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear making mistakes.

 

24. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I don’t learn from my wins but from my mistakes.

 

25. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if I succeed on my attempt, then I am winning, and if not, I am failing, when it is not about that at all.

 

26. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that life would be boring if everything I did succeeded.

 

27. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that if I think I don’t need self-forgiveness, then I am failing.

 

28. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I am never truly alone.

 

29. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe in the divide between the dead and the living.

 

30. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be dead instead of realizing and understanding that life is where I have to be, for now.

 

31. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I am far more useful alive than dead.

 

32. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being dead.

 

33. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to overlook Jesus’ message instead of applying it in my life unconditionally.

 

34. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear getting old.

 

35. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that unless I stand up for myself, nothing and no one will.

 

36. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear doing freestyles and forgiveness unconditionally.

 

37. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I am the same as Jesus, Buddha, and all others.

 

38. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear putting goals so big that I don’t know if I will be able to achieve them.

 

39. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I have been given life exactly the same way as all others, including the greatest.

 

40. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear having my things stolen.

 

41. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to doubt myself and what I say.

 

42. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be grounded with myself here.

 

43. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I am the breath of life.

 

44. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not live what I preach, making it useless.

 

45. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear Ruben.

 

46. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear who I really am and live suppressed instead.

 

47. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to suppress myself and my self-expression.

 

48. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I am awesome.

 

49. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I am the best.

 

50. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I can be the best version of myself in this life.

 

51. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being killed by people who disagree with me, like Jesus.

 

52. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that being killed for saying what I think is right and true is an honor.

 

53. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I will not be killed for saying the truth.

 

54. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that death is an illusion.

 

55. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I must be grateful for everything I’ve gone through.

 

56. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that self-forgiveness, as life, is not about getting it right or wrong, but about self-honesty and application.

 

57. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that friends can be supportive or an impediment depending on the relationship.

 

58. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to mess up my count to a hundred.

 

59. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that everything that happened in my life, even losses, is specific for me to stand up and change forever.

 

60. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not apply self-forgiveness more often.

 

61. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not being able to apply self-forgiveness because I am dead.

 

62. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to die to show others what not to do instead of living as an example of what to do.

 

63. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that negative examples are everywhere but real living examples are rare and needed.

 

64. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand my own power.

 

65. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that if I am never alone, I should start acting like it.

 

66. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I must show myself and others that my father didn’t die in vain.

 

67. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that everything that happened is specific.

 

68. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to tell life to do whatever it takes to make me stand up instead of standing up myself.

 

69. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be obsessed with women instead of focusing on myself first.

 

70. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that once I work on myself, I will find someone who matches me.

 

71. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I am okay even without a partner.

 

72. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to finish things fast.

 

73. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I am capable of much more than I think.

 

74. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I am from Earth and the same as all others.

 

75. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that equality is what matters and all else is noise.

 

76. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe in separation as if we are different, when we are not.

 

77. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I am capable of doing what’s best even if I’m not doing what others are doing.

 

78. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand the level of specificity it will take to change the system.

 

79. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear what changing the system entails.

 

80. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I have to change myself first and foremost.

 

81. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to do self-forgiveness as a show for others instead of doing it for myself.

 

82. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that unless I do it for myself, self-forgiveness will not be effective.

 

83. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that we are in this for life.

 

84. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to lose sight of the vision that everyone is equal.

 

85. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that death is the great equalizer between everyone on Earth.

 

86. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not put the same effort at the end as I do at the beginning of tasks.

 

87. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that if I don’t succeed in changing myself, many others will suffer as well.

 

88. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see the responsibility I have in walking myself to life.

 

89. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear living until old age due to body aches.

 90. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I can welcome all pains as they help me to change.

 91. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that the joy is not in the end, but in the process.

 92. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe the process has an end.

 93. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I am not a baby anymore and I have responsibilities.

 94. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want someone to take care of me instead of me caring for others.

 95. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I am free to the extent that I give freedom.

 96. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that by giving I receive equally.

 97. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that life is about expression, not money.

 98. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that it’s not about blaming money, but redesigning how it works.

 99. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that this life is more important than I think.

 100. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize, and understand that I should care for everyone else as I care for myself equally.

Day 160: I Am the Same Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow

No matter what happens I must be the same 'Yesterday, today and tomorrow', I cannot let events change me or anything else. I've seen that 'fame' tend to change me, basically I become more stupid lol and also worries about the future make me 'constrict' instead of walking with my head straight no matter what.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I must be the same yesterday, today and tomorrow - as Jesus said

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to let 'fame' change me

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to let 'external attention' change me

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I am capable of being the same yesterday, today and tomorrow

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I have 'some' time to apply myself to live so that I am the same always  - yesterday, today and tomorrow

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be lazy about finding ways to live what's best for all starting from myself

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that if I am Not the same yesterday, today and tomorrow = I have a problem

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I should not fear the future as it never arrives

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that the future is simply the continuation of the present

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that all that I am is Here and that's where I must apply all of myself

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand both Past and Future do not exist one is past and the other is yet to come

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I am Here no matter what always

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to be hard on myself because of the/my past instead of forgiving it and letting it go unconditionally

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I am unconditionally Here no matter what happens

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see nothing that can happen is unsumournable and only death is final

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to change wether it is Yesterday, Today or Tomorrow

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I have to match the unconditionality of Life

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see that = To be Life I have to do like Life does

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that to do what Life does I have to Give as I would like to Receive

Day 159: Overcoming Resistance and Fear

 

 I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to believe my own limitations

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I am not my limitations

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear never being able to overcome my limitations

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I am not alone

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I have me

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear resistance

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I have to be okay with experiencing resistance

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and undrestand that resistance does not mean impossibility

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand  that resistance is the compass that indicates where should I go

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to respond to resistance with avoidance instead of application/facing resistance

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I have to be grateful to resistance as it show me where to go

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that fear is an illusion

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fall for fear instead of facing fear head on

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I am capable of facing my fear

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I can act despite fear

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I am more than capable to face and overcome resistance and fear by acting despite of it all

I commit myself to remind myself that my resistances show me the way to go

I commit myself to remind myself that I should go where I resist

I commit myself to show myself that fear is an illusion

I commit myself to show myself I can go where I resist

Day 158: On Principle

I don't do things for likes, although is an 'ego boost' - best to act on Principle, the principle of what is Best for All, if people like it, good, if not - it does not matter, because not everyone will like it, we have to simply be the majority of people.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to want recognition for my vlogs and blogs

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be liked

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not like myself and look for acceptance and being liked outside of myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I am okay without recongnition

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I have to accept myself  - all of myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to dislike myself over the years, instead of nurturing the initial self love I had for myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not love myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I am allright the way I am - with all my flaws

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I am enough and do not need validation

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be recognized instead of recognizing myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise ans understand that even if only one person watch my content, it is worth it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that more views does not mean more quality of the material

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that if I say the thruth it will not be pretty or acclaimed

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that it is false that I have to get views to be someone

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I should share unconditionally

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to stop if I don't get likes instead of being self-motivated

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I don't need external approval

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I should do what I see is Best for All and that's it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am not enough

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to believe I am not valid

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to give up on loving myself

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I am worth loving

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to believe it is valid to hate myself

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I am not alone

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I must stop hating myself

I commit myself to investigate the reasons why I don't love myself and stop them

I commit myself to remind myself that I am lovable

I commit myself to remind myself I have to love myself first - before loving anyone else

Day 157: Do - Never Try

Have the patience to become better;

If you 'Try' hard and do not succeed then you can get frustrated. 

Best to not try but instead Do so no matter what the outcome, you did your best. 

Because if you try it is a form of self sabotage because when/if it doesn't work you created a negative memory that will result in more easily Giving Up, and one should Never Give Up. 

Don't half-ass it. Never try - rather do to the best of your hability.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to half-ass it when I percieve something is difficult

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit myself by judging something as difficult

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to have things easier instead of working for being better

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see the common sense of the phrase 'don't wish it were easier, wish you were better'

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that it is best to not give 'logical explanations' for giving up, either I do something or I don't, no excuses

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I am not here to get/have things be easy

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and undrestand that difficulty is only a perception

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I can become better to be able to do so called 'difficult things'

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to resist my reality instead of accepting that something is difficult to me at the moment for example a task at the job

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I do things usually that others regard as difficult like writing a blog

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that labeling something as difficult is an excuse to not give it my all

I commit myself to give it my all even when I percieve something as difficult

I commit myself to remind myself that 'difficult' things will make me expand myself

I commit myself to remind myself that difficult is something personal that I must overcome

Day 156: When No One is Watching?

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to behave different when I am alone

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that everything is known at All times

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to be entertaining if someone is watching when I am alone

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to live for others instead of for myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am destined to fail

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sabotage myself to fulfill my prophecy - self fulfilled prophecy

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I should not change my behaviour when I am alone or if I think someone is watching

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make a big deal of what I do in my life

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear not having any money

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I am one amongst billions

I forgive myself that I have acceepted and allowed myself to have a worldview where I am central

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I can create a good life for myself and support others as well

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see that I come first

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want others that I regard as more than to plan my life

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see falling for behavior addictions is giving up

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I can stand up for myself and for All

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not redirect my energy into creativity instead of destruction/addiction

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to be ashamed of my living

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be greateful for my past that thanks to it I am where I am now

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I can be and become much more than what I think I can

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to judge awareness living as heavy and difficult when it is not so in fact

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that I will be ok

I commit myself to remind myself that living with awareness is best

I commit myself to remind myself autopilot living is not good

I commit myself to breathe and be aware of breath as much as possible

I commit myself to practice integrity - doing what's best even when 'alone'

Day 155: When Not Loving the Past

Sometimes I am a bit annoyed - that's the word - when I am observing the past or what 'has just happened' because I don't like it, I judge the past, immediate or late past. Then I realize, hey, the past that 'just happened' has lead me to be here where I am now, where I have 'immense power' to change, to create my future in the present.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to resist to my past, immediate or distant past

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be grateful for all my past happenings and experiences as they led me to where I am now - where I can create anew

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand all that happened to me has led me to where I am now, capable of change

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see it is up to me to say 'enough is enough' to whatever it is I dislike of my past

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that it is up to me to in every breath bury the old and birth the new

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that the 'lessons' from the past will be enough when I decide they are enough

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see the power in the word decision

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that from the shit grows the plant - thus my past can be however it is but I can make it grow into a beatiful life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not rejoice at where I am now - always clinging to the past that I cannot change

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not  see, realise and understand I will stop reacting to my past when I decide and see it made me arrive where I am now - and for that I am grateful

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that change is a decision

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe it will be too difficult to change everything of me - not seeing, realising and understanding one can do everything one breath at a time

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be hard on myself for my past

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I must be grateful to my past  as it made me arrive where I am, no matter how dark and ugly

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my past instead of forgiving it and letting it go

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I can change the future doing what is best in every moment

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I am capable of being and becoming the best version of myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that without accepting the future, forgiving and forgetting - I cannot create the future that is Best for All

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I can do, be and become so much more than what I am currently doing and experiencing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not immediately forgive and forget the past

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to control the future instead of focusing on Here and being flexible with whatever happens, that in turn can be blessings in disguise

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not accept and forgive and forget my past

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see the joy that comes with accepting my past

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand it is not how many times I fall but how many times I stand up

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to cycle my falls, repeat them instead of learning, changing and letting go

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand I don't have to repeat my past

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand the power of change

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realise and understand that repeating the past is a decision

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not decide what is best for All - and thus for me - in every moment of breath

Day 154: I Am Here

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live with the autopilot not realizing I Am Here

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that this ‘being here’ has always and will always be 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I don’t have to be ‘the best’ meaning giving the best conversation or other superlative, but simply be me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that it is fine being silent instead of wanting to be ‘more’ and ‘the best’

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to have an effect with my words instead of sharing myself unconditionally or having lighthearted talk

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be too serious

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe my words will have a grandiose outcome instead of simply sharing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that it is best to be silent than to rant and rave

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that the problem is thinking about the self - without the self there is no problem

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to have a powerful grandiose self

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see I don’t have to ‘save the world’ - and it is impossible too

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take this burden upon myself of wanting to save the world

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to impose to me the burden of guiding or saving others

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am a savior instead of seeing I can only ever be an example

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can become an example, and that’s it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see my own living will be the living example that I want others to have

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not be an example unto myself - for myself and others

Day 153: Fame Made Me Stupid

 I don't know if famous people feel it or notice it but the day I did a stand-up at a bar that went well, that night my friend beat me at chess a bunch of times, I was definetly distracted and could understand how famous people go weird some times.

When there is equality there are no special ones because everyone is special.

I am one, you are one, 1+1=2, not 1+1=0.75 or 2.5. So you can work out for yourself equals - that doesn't mean the same.

The most radical of all, the equality equation. And lets end Hollywood 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be famous

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear to stand up for myself 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see how shitty some people have it 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to change whenever I perceive I have many eyes on me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see,  realise and understand it is not about how many people 'follow/listen' to me

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear rejection 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be noticed

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to plan my life in my head instead of being grateful of what life offers me

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to use fear as an excuse to not perfect myself in self honesty

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to believe I should get the attention of peers

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to link being liked to survival

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to tie self worth to the attention I get 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to link attention to money 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to want to be rich 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see that if I am not rich is because I am not ready

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that it takes action to be rich/wealthy

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to sabotage myself instead of supporting myself

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not walk the talk

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not embrace my situation fully, no matter how difficult it gets

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sabotage myself with backdoors to my plan

I commit myself to close all backdoors to my plan 

I commit myself to either change the plan or stick to it unconditionally - no backdoors

I commit myself to be self-honest 

I commit myself to value what I have instead of resisting my situation 

I commit myself to be open to whatever happens 

I commit myself to embrace myself fully no matter where I am or what happens

I commit myself to embrace every situation as an opportunity

I commit myself to disregard fame and be true to myself at all times always 

I commit myself to be self-honest no matter how much money I have 

I commit myself to support myself to be aware in every situation 

I commit myself to watch my mind and direct myself to correct it effectively in every breath

Day 152: For Better or Worse

I have a small tattoo of a triangle in my left arm, its connecting three freckles. My friend that did it said it means that 'always in life you can choose for better or worse'

Indeed in life we have to choose what to do and the only recommendation is to choose what is best for You within what is best for All.

My tattoo triangle is a 'Right triangle', if you look from the base, there are two options, either one line up - at a 90° angle- or only a point -you are stuck-.

So lets decide the best for us an everyone else, and correct ourselves without fuss if we choose unwisely some time.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see,  realize and understand that I am free to choose what is Best for All every time

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that being able to choose what is Best for All every time is true freedom

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I don't need consequence to change

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I can make it easier for me by not choosing consequence paths and instead choosing what's Best 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that there will always be consequence, so it's best to create the best consequence every time

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myseld to not see the simplicity of choosing what is Best, even if it's difficult- at some point it will be natural 

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to put excuses to not choose what is best

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myseld to avoid things I perceive as difficult instead of seeing that they will get easier in time 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that, like studies, its difficult until you master something 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to distract myself from taking the decisions that are Best

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not see, realize and understand that I don't have to be a genius to choose whatever is Best for All 

I forgive myself that I've not accepted and allowed myself to see that even a small decision of not sleeping in but studying a little bit is choosing what's Best 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe I am alone and that my choices don't matter

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see that I am part of the whole and if I support myself I support the whole and vice versa 

I commit myself to support myself and thus All in my choices

I commit myself to remind myself to make decisions that are Best for All,  and thus best for me too

I commit myself to remind myself difficult is not  forever, and if it is - so be it

I commit myself to remind myself that easy and not best is the path to hell - and vice versa